Sharing a Bed
by Cherished Tenshi
Summary: Vanille's new mission: get all six of them together in the same bed. Sazh swore that it sounded a lot better than it seemed. Oneshot, set during Oerba.


**Disclaimer: **I don't own anything, save for the story.

**A/N: **I wrote this for the tropes_bingo place over at dreamwidth. It's been a while since I posted fanfic, I know! :)

Needless to say, I hope you enjoy it!

* * *

Oerba didn't offer much in the way of comforts, not after five hundred years. Sazh was surprised to see that there were even beds still standing, rusting as they were, but after Snow nearly broke his back after one snapped underneath his sheer weight, the group census was that the local beds really weren't too safe. Lightning, Fang, and Hope had been sent out to clear out the immediate area of Cie'th so that they didn't have claws ripping them apart in their sleep, but the silence only reminded them all that Gran Pulse truly was abandoned, devoid of all human life. He shivered at the thought; trying to imagine Galvenda as abandoned was impossible, but for Vanille and Fang, that was their reality.

Speaking of Vanille... she'd been rather glum since they'd gotten to the top of Taejin's Tower. Not that he could blame her, of course. Seeing something like that would knock the wind out of anyone's pipe.

He buried his fingers in greasy hair and groaned. From the tabletop, Chocobo chirped at him, tipping her head to the side, confused. "Not now," he muttered, squatting at the furry bird. "C'mon! You gonna let an old man moan for a couple minutes or not!?"

"I found it!" Vanille shrieked. It sounded far away, but the sheer power in her yell was enough to make him wince.

"Found _what!?_" He yelled back.

"Oh, _hell _no!" Snow's voice was significantly deeper, but as loud as ever. "We're not- I'd rather-"

"We'll all fit in, stop being so silly!"

"I'm not bein' _silly_, I'm being _realistic_. You think Light and Hope are gonna want to get in one of these?"

"They'll have to!" was the cheerful chirp. "I'll make 'em!"

Interested piqued, Sazh dragged himself off the creaking coach and hauled himself up the stairs. The door that was previously locked was now halfway across the wooden flooring. In the corner of the room, past dusted photographs and rusted cutlery, Vanille was swinging her legs while sitting on the edge of a massive bed that dominated most of the room. Snow stood near her, arms crossed, his posture a mixture of disbelief and unimpressed.

"We're not gonna-"

"The hell is this?"

"Hi, Sazh!" Vanille leapt off the bed, smile wider than any other he'd seen the last couple of weeks. It was enough to make him smile back, even as he tried to remain firm. He was the papa of the group, after all; Snow and Hope definitely couldn't be relied on for that kind of stuff. "I found a bed!"

"Yeah, I can see that." He raised his arms up and dropped them. "And – lemme guess – you want to sleep in it?"

"Not just her," Snow interjected, grinning. "She wants all six of us to get all cuddly together." He snorted loudly. "Like Sis is gonna agree with that."

"It'd be comfy..."

Vanille's eyes lit up while Snow openly gaped at him. She grinned. "I know, wouldn't it?"

"Are you _kiddin_' me?"

"But getting Soldier in there ain't gonna be fun."

Vanille hummed, then her face exploded with glee. "We _should _still have some tequila somewhere nearby, it ages pretty well..."

"You're not-"

"Don't get her nowhere _near _tequila!" Snow was waving his paws about like a lost bear. "She goes crazy!" Then, his voice dropped to a mumble. "Least that's what Serah says..."

"Crazy for Light is agreeing to hug people!" Vanille chirped. "And if she's all happy, then Hope'll get happy too!"

"Worse comes to worse, you can use your sex appeal!"

That, Sazh grimaced to himself as Vanille leapt off the bed in outrage, was the single worst thing Snow had ever said, and knowing how dumb he could be, he didn't even mean it that way.

"You're _engaged!_" Vanille shrieked, fist thumping with every word. "Dirty dirty _dirty-_!"

"I swear I didn't mean like that please stop hurting me!"  
"What's this about tequila?"

Sazh startled with a yelp and knocked Chocobo out of his hair by accident. Vanille immediately stopped her brutal assault on Snow's arm and whirled around with a coy grin. Standing at the doorway was Lightning, arms and legs crossed, eyebrows raised. She had that look in her eyes, though; the one that spoke of her being a lot more interested in something that her body language let on.

Sazh felt his heart shrivel up and die a little inside. "H-hey, Light. Back already? How'd it go?"

Lightning, however, seemed to currently have her mind on one track only. "Pulse has tequila?"

"It's _Gran _Pulse!" Fang hollered from downstairs. Sazh winced as Hope yelped as well, before Fang's voice dropped to a low: "Stop bein' a wimp and just press the thing on!"

"Why can't I just heal it?"

"That ain't how you handle things here in Gran Pulse!"

"Then how _do _you!?"

"Like this!"

"_Oww _ow ow!"

"Oh chin up!"

There was a dark and sinister vibe from behind. Glancing back, Sazh spotted that Snow had gone into his Papa Wolf Mode, as fondly nicknamed by Vanille and Fang. He had all of the signs of it; chewing on bottom lip; bandanna creased with how intensely he was frowning; hands scrunching at his sides. "Oh no," he whispered to himself. Vanille caught his words and her cheerfulness drained off.

"What's up with Hope?" Snow demanded.

"He's fine. Where's the tequlia?"

"Light," Vanille said with a nervous giggle. "You really should-"

"I'm gonna check on him." And with that, Snow was storming down the stairs. Sazh sighed and waited for the inevitable moment when Fang would hammer his butt into the skies above for messing in her business.

"He only got a cut." Still, Lightning was smiling a little to herself, so it couldn't have been too serious. He most likely got it from a stupid accident. "That's why I wanted the tequila. To help clean it out."

Vanille frowned, tilting her head a little to the side. "I don't think that's-"

"That's great!" Sazh interrupted her loudly, grinning. He gave the girl a quick look to hopefully get across the fact that he knew what to do, and turned back to Lightning. "Good thing you're a soldier, huh?"

"Was."

"...How come you don't just heal it up?"

She blinked. Then blinked again. Before blinking a third time. Without a word, she left the room.

"She forgot that, didn't she."

Vanille giggled again. "She's surprisingly forgetful sometimes, isn't she? But enough of that! We need to get everyone into the same bed!"

"Vanille, that really doesn't sound that nice..."

"It'll be all nice and smug and warm!"

"Then just use some Fire magic!"

She sighed and sounded as though she was speaking to a stubborn toddler. "You kiddin'? It'll burn Oerba down to ashes if we leave it unattended!"

"...Right."

"C'mon Sazh, help me out!" She latched onto both of his hands and swung them back and forth, grinning. "It'll be fun!"

He sighed. What chances did an old man like him have against the terror that was cute children? "...All right."

"Yay!"

* * *

"He's _fine_, just _perfect_, and if one more of you guys ask I'll hurl Bahamut on your asses." Everyone stayed silent. "Great!"

Hope was now sitting in the protective cradle of Snow's massive arm, head ducked down sheepishly near his chest. "I can talk for myself, Fang."

"You don't seem too willing to, I ain't gonna lie."

Silence fell again. Sazh risked a glance over to Lightning, who had a rusted bottle of tequila cuddled in her arms – for whatever reason, the Pulsians used metal containers for everything – but she hadn't taken a drink out of it, as far as he'd seen. He felt Vanille lean into his body and he stroked her hair gently. She'd let it down for the night, and to her right, Fang's face looked brooding in the fire light.

Then:

"So how about that bed?"

Sazh heard Snow thump his head onto the ground below before hissing and snapping himself back up straight. Hope silently snickered as the giant grumbled to himself, rubbing the back of his head.

"_Vanille_," Sazh said slowly, patting her shoulder. "We're not all gonna fit on it."

"But it'll be comfy! _Really _comfy!"

"There's a bed?" Lightning asked. When Vanille nodded, she sighed. "Why did no one mention it sooner?"

Snow sighed. "Sis, we can't all share the same bed; hell, you don't let us heal you even when _we're _the medics and you're a ravager or whatever!"

"I change the paradigm, idiot."

"You're not even the leader most of the time!"

A pause, then: "I don't mind sharing a bed. _You're _the one who's being awkward. As usual."

"I ain't-" Snow's voice was washed with realisation. "Oh, I am. Uh." A pause, then: "Whadda _mean _'as usual'?"

"I don't mind sharing either," Hope was quiet, but his voice still had the authoritative tone that made people listen. He'd be a fine leader someday, if this quest didn't screw them all into becoming Cie'th first. "Do any of you guys mind?"

"Me and Vanille've had more cuddly times than you've had partners, kid," Fang crackled loudly as both Hope and Vanille flushed bright red and hid their faces with their hands. "Completely platonic, of course. We'll put on a hell of a show if you really want it."

Vanille shook her head, still blushing. "Please don't."

"I've spent lots of time with Dajh in bed. Nightmares and stuff." The fact that they had mostly been about his dead wife wasn't something he was going to bring up. "So I'm cool as well."

All eyes fell on Snow.

"I don't – if you wanna! I mean-"

"Great." Lightning elbowed Snow in the ribs as she stood up, scoffing when he moaned and lightly punched her leg. "Let's go, then."

"To bed!" Vanille cheered as she grabbed Hope's hand and began to drag him upstairs. It was a good thing that they were all closer than family. Sazh chuckled to himself. Lightning dropped beside him as they walked up the stairs, tequila now stuffed under her armpit. From behind, he could hear Snow and Fang bickering with each other, but like always, it was nothing more than close friends jiving and poking fun at one another. He paid it no mind.

"Not gonna drink that, huh?"

"Hope's underage," she said flatly. "So we need to get rid of it." The grin that she normally saved for intense battles was present as she held it up. "So how about we start now?"

"_Now? _As in now _now_?"

"Why not?"

"Well-"

"Alcohol?" Fang swung an arm around Sazh's shoulders, poking her head in-between him and Lightning. She grinned and chuckled. "_Tequila_. You, my friend, have excellent taste." And with that, she yanked the bottle off Lightning and screwed off the top before dunking half of it over Snow.

"Hey! _Hey!_"

Lightning was full out laughing now. Sazh chuckled to himself and cried in dismay when Fang decided to dump the other half all over him. "Hey! You little-"

"One inch shorter!" She poked at his cheeks. "Oi, have some fun, would ya?"

"I am _soaking!_" He yelled, flapping out his arms.

"Aw, liven up!" Lightning was ignoring Snow as he attempted to moan at her. He suddenly tackled her in a hug from behind, sending the both of them stumbling up the rest of the stairs.

"S-_Snow _get off me!"

"You said you wanted some tequila!"

"That doesn't – _get off!_"

Sazh remembered the one time he had hugged her in desperation and shivered, rubbing at his jaw. Never again.

"Hurry up, you guys!" Vanille was waving at him and Fang from the doorway. "Or you two'll have to sleep beside Lightning!"

Sazh and Fang glanced at each other solemnly before racing up the stairs.

"I ain't sleeping beside her!" He was wheezing for breath, ignoring the way that Fang crackled at him. "She snores worse than a behemoth!"

"Shut up and get in!"

"Guys!" Hope squeaked. "I-I'm trying to get changed!"

"Ah, who needs clothes?"

"_Fang_-!"

"You've got a change of clothes?" Snow asked, rubbing at his stomach. Lightning was untying his bandanna from behind, face passive as ever.

"Took it off a dead corpse." Fang rolled herself into the bed's centre with a grin.

"You _what_!?" He shivered. "_Ewww_."

"Why was there even a corpse?" Vanille murmured.

Fang punched her shoulder. "Who knows."

Hope immediately dropped the clothes that he had been planning to change into, disgust and horror and surprise all rolled as one into his face. Silently, he climbed into the bed and laid down at the very edge, curling up so that he took up as little space as possible.

Unfortunately, Snow did not have the same idea, and nearly suffocated both Hope and Fang as he leapt in between the two and kicked his legs out. The bed groaned under his weight, and for a horrible second, Sazh imagined it snapping clean, but it somehow held firm. "Doesn't this place have a quilt?"

"Don't you have enough room?" Fang sniped as she shoved his leg off her foot. "_Space _you_ –_ whoa, you're warm. Why the hell they call you Snow? Keep your leg there."

"I, uh, don't know?"

"You're warm?" Vanille weaved her way across the bed so that she was snuggled in the small gap between Snow and Fang. "Oh, _wow._ I'm not moving!"

"He's taken." Lightning crossed her arms.

"I wasn't-"

"C'mon, kids, this old man needs some good sleep." Sazh didn't know where he should go; to the comfort and human furnace that was Snow, or to somewhere that had a decent amount of space? He settled for the latter, climbing in to Fang's left, near the edge of the bed. Chocobo chirped out of his hair; yawning, he settled it down on where Snow's bandanna was lying on the floor and wrapped its frayed edge across the bird. "Night night."

Lightning sat down on the bed's edge and slowly unbuckled her boots and took them off. After that, she slid off her military coat and armour piece. When she stood up again, she was staring at the bed with such intensity that it was a surprise that nothing caught on fire. Eventually, she sighed, and walked over Sazh's prone form so that she was eventually lying between him and Fang. He felt her arms knocking against his back as she tried to get comfy, her apologising softly several times, but eventually they were all comfy. Sazh had rolled over onto his back. His elbow was resting against the top of Lightning's shoulder, his other hand dropping off the bed's edge, legs scrunched up close as Lightning liked to spray her legs wide. He didn't have much room, and he could only imagine how tight poor Vanille was, squeezed between the two giants of their family. Not to mention that it stank of alcohol and dust, but... it still managed to be comfortable, even in the tedious silence.

Snow was the first to break it, with a quiet: "Night guys. Love you all."

Fang snorted, but it wasn't difficult to imagine the soft smile she must have been wearing. "Right, you sappy idiot. Love you too."

"Night, guys!" Vanille chirped up.

"Good night," Hope said quietly.

Sazh shuffled a little before muttering. "Have a good sleep, kids."

There was a silence as they all waited for Lightning to speak. Sazh knew that she wasn't exactly sappy, but surely..?  
When she did speak, she sounded embarrassed. "I. uh."

"Yeah?" Vanille said gently, prompting her on.

"I need the toilet."

Everyone groaned loudly.

"_Now!?_" Sazh found himself grumble. "_Really_?"

"Sis, I can't _believe _you!"

"It's not like I can-"

"You are _so stupid _sometimes! I can't-"

"I'll hold it in! Let's just sleep! Forget I asked!"

"I ain't waking up in a pool of urine."

"_Fang_-!"

"Well I ain't! Haul your ass up."

"I'm not-"

Sazh sighed.

It was going to be a _long _night.


End file.
